Quality Pen-Pal wanted... where is the best place to find you?

I am looking for a beautiful brother, a soldier, and intellect who can be a bad *** when needed(but never with me), 25-35 years old, tall, built to GO!. Got to impress me with his writing skills but has to have the total package, (i.e. beauty, brains, and brawn) Where can I find a pen-pal like that?